If I'm going to be honest...

On Sunday the sermon was about telling the truth.

So here it is.

I woke up to my sick baby and whinging girls.  Luke was obviously in no state to be dragged to playgroup, so I frantically had to organise other busy mums to take over for me...the hazards of being the one in charge.  If I am being honest, I hate being in charge.  It would be much nicer to just call in sick, and let someone else do the work for the day. Instead, even if I am sick, I know that I MUST get the work done - noone else will organise the light party in 8 weeks time, or run Sunday School and Bible in Schools each week - those are my jobs and If I want a day off, It needs to be planned carefully by me.

Luke won't sleep and he is not interested in food.  He wants something, but can't tell us what it is so he just sits there crying until I pop him on a hip and try and make school lunches with one hand.   Meanwhile, Kate is having a full blown tantrum on the thinking chair because she does NOT want to wear trousers today (which I stupidly told her she had to wear).  After a trip to the doctor (bronchitis again to go with the ear infection)  and dropping off the girls (Jaimee was 10 minutes late to school and-don't-you-dare-give-me-that-look-Ms-Climo!) I stop by the church to pick up some work, go home and attempt to do some work while Luke sleeps.

 By now, my headache was become a migraine.  I just want to curl up in my dark bedroom on my bed, and stare with half shut eyes at a movie.  But this is all part of being a working mum - I can't stop.  Luke is tired, but screams when I pop him into bed.  Finally he falls asleep and I get an hour of work done before Marty text messages me to remind me I was meant to drop off his bike repair kit to work.  Drat.  Oh well, Luke is awake again crying, so off we go in the car.  If I am going to be honest, I actually had to close my eyes while driving down the road today - only for a second, but the pain was that bad.  I get home and attempt to feed Luke, who is just not interested.  Back to bed for grumpy boy, and I sit back down to do some more work.  An hour later, I call it a day. I just can't concentrate any more and the pressing work has been done.  I can't concentrate on anything with this headache so I flick through our sky channels, watching half of a disney tween sitcom.  I pull my computer out and write this dribble of an honest yet depressing blog.  Oh, I guess I should stop now - Luke is screaming again.

If I am going to be honest, My life is not all bubbles and squeak and happy children.  I do not always have it all together.  But I DO have something.  Our memory verse for this month is "My Grace is all you need for my power is strongest when you are weak" (2 Cor 12:9). Well Lord, I am weak.  Thank you that YOU are strong and YOU hold me up and keep me joyful and smiling even on a day like this.  And that is the honest truth.

Now, I am going to take a deep breath and go and kiss my snotty coughing baby boy.